Every now and again, I click on another lady’s website – sometimes through curiosity or by accident, sometimes in the name of research. Today I did just that, and it has taken me a few minutes to calm down.
What raised my blood pressure so much, I hear you ask? Was it the sight of her in her scanties? Or the delicate yet seductive prose, painting a vivid and erotic picture of the fragrant hour one could spend in her arms?
Words such as ‘survices’, ‘thorghts’ and ‘penitrition’ floated past my eyes, interspersed with ‘lovly’ and ‘curvey’.
I know, I know, I sound like a bitch. But the thing is, this was a very pretty lady and when I forced my mind to focus on the content of her text rather than the mechanics, it was obvious that she was fun-loving, cheerful, friendly, open-minded and would probably give some lucky chap the absolute time of his life.
And what I really, really want to do is contact her and say ‘I was looking at your site, you look amazing, would you mind if I pointed out a couple of errors?’ But she’d probably say ‘**** off, you cheeky bitch, and mind your own business!’