Deliver me not …

Published January 18, 2011 by Claire

I had a call last Friday. A lovely lady with a sadly rather nasal voice asked me to confirm my identity (which always bugs the hell out of me, ‘cos if you called me surely you should know who I am?) and when I did so informed me that she was calling from Argos to arrange my delivery for ‘next Tuesday’. Well this puzzled me slightly as I hadn’t ordered anything; and I had to stop her in the middle of listing my ‘timeslot options’ to ask her what on earth they were planning to deliver?

“Your new bed, of course Madam!”

I hate being called Madam, it makes me feel like Hyacinth Bucket. I pointed out to Nasal Nelly that I had in fact ordered my bed from Homebase, not Argos. “Oh well it’s all the same thing, innit?”

Is it?

Anyway, she went back to rattling off my ‘timeslot options’ and I selected 10am-2pm. So naturally two burly vanmen were hammering on my door at 7.30 this morning! To be fair I think me in my pj’s with bed hair and pillow creases was punishment enough for them

Bless them, they did their level best not to show their natural fear and delivered the bed, which TMBK has duly put together this evening. His reward was being allowed to smash up the old bed – what is about lads and destroying stuff? He looked like all his Christmases had arrived in one lump!

So, I’m signing off now to climb into my new bed. Alone for now – who will be the first gent to join me in it?

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